Sometimes life hands you a basket full of goodies. And while they are wonderfully tasting you cannot possibly eat them all in on setting. Some people let them go to waste, others put them up for later. What we decide to do with them says loads about our personality. Actually every decision we make says loads about our personality. However, right now, I'm not sure what mine is saying, but I know my basket is full and I have to prepare for later too.
I have been working like crazy to build up a midwifery business, move a house, clear land, crochet, sleep, be that awesome off-grid homeschooling mom and a great girlfriend, but I cannot help but feeling I'm falling flat somewhere. Like I've dropped a ball into quicksand and it's slowly sinking and I cannot get it out without taking my entire self under. Overwhelmed. Overworked. Exhausted.
But the thing is, I have to be this way. I have to have so many balls in the area that I feel like I'm losing control to BE in control. So while most would go out and simplify. Remove one area of work, I add another. To find the calm, I decide to can. You know, put up produce the old fashioned way. And while I love this, I really am unsure why I decided to put more on myself instead of less. Maybe it says I'm crazy and I choose to ignore it by diving into more work, maybe I really do find calm in chaos. Or maybe it's my messed up conspiracy theory riddled mind that thinks that government is preparing for war and wants to make sure my family and those I love are taken care of if things really hit the fan.
But for now.... I'm going to coffee it up, grind the wheel and put up some salsa and carrots. :)
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